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Submitted by: mastercylinder On: June 18th, 2004
File Size: 31
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Artist's Comment:
After the positive reaction I recieved from my short story 'A Short Note from a Vampire and His Cat' I have decided to upload some of the short stories that me and my friend, Dennis Aloisio, wrote several years ago. Dennis has recently died and I am the sole owner of the copyrights to these tales...
WARNING: These stories are often very violent!!! Our concept was to write the blackest of comedies, therefore you will find that these stories are not only gory, but darkly humorous.
And so I present to you...
The Doctors and Patient 2270
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The Doctors an Patient 2270
"He's quite mad," Dr. X said to Dr. Z as they both gazed into the video monitor at a man in a padded cell. " I don't think he's stable enough to move to the upper floors yet so we keep him in the underground units.
Dr. X handed Dr. Z an extra dry martini with two precicely placed olives on a toothpick placed professionaly inside the glass.
"What is the patients name?" Z asked.
"We don't know, he refuses to tell us. He was found in a mud pit somewhere in West Virginia, no identification, no tracable fingerprints, medical or dental records. Nothing. We just call him 2270."
"Why is that?"
"Well, you see," Dr. X spoke, "what he would tell us is that he is from the Two-thousandth-two-hundred galaxy away from us in the seventieth solar system outward from the galaxies core, so hence, we just refer to him as 2270."
"How very peculiar," Dr. Z said. He stared ever more curiously into the monitor. Patient 2270 was taking bites out of his own arm. Chunks of flesh lay scattered around him in bloody arrangements. Blood, dried and wet, covered his face as he dove in for another bite. "Facinating," Z said as he pulled out a notebook to dictate his observations.
"We don't know how much longer he could continue to consume himself before dying. I assume not much longer, maybe by lunchtime, hehe." X said as he sat, rubbing his beard in thought.
"May I speak with 2270?" asked Z.
"No, I am afraid not," Dr. X stood up and went to a device that printed out a medical analysis form on patient 2270. "You see, there are no doors in that cell. We sealed them up last week, leaving only a small slit large enough to slide a tray of food in, even though he refuses to eat anything other than himself."
"I see," Dr. Z pondered. He looked back down to the monitor. 2270 had bitten all the way down into his arm, amazingly not breaking any major veins along the way, and was gnawing on the bone.
Dr. X examined the medical printout carefully then returned to look into the monitor with Dr. Z, "When he finally dies, we'll unseal the room and remove his body. More than likely we will chemically decompose his remains for use as a food substitute and desert topping for our other patients."
"Uh hum," said Z, "If possible, may I have 2270's brain. I would dearly love to examine it, maybe even put some of that cloning technolgy and equiptment to use back at my lab."
"I don't know," X pondered, "I'd have to pull some pretty powerful strings, afterall, no brain, no desert topping."
Dr, Z thought for a moment then said "What about if I give you that two-headed baby you've been wanting over at my lab... it eats too much anyway, twice the normal patient rations."
"Hmmm, thats a good offer, but, I still don't know..."
"What about if I throw in a couple of fresh hearts and two weeks at my time-share in Palm Springs," Z countered.
Dr. X's eyes widened a little, "You've got a deal Z," he said.
"Excellent," Dr. Z rubbed his medical hands together then looked at his watch, "Hmm, dead by lunch time... so I'll pick up the brain around, say... sixish?"
"That would be fine," Dr. X said.
Dr. Z smiled and walked toward the exit door saying, "See you and that wonderfull brain then, ciao!" and left the room.
Dr. X waved goodbye then turned back to the monitor and loomed close, staring intently at the patient, "Well, well, my friend," he said, "Soon you'll be history. What a pity." Dr. X. chuckled to himself, "If only the others knew you were once the great Dr. C. Hmmph, you had to go and experiment with that extra-terrestrial fungus, didn't you. And now look... that fungus took over your body and you became Them. Well, thats what you get for experimenting on yourself."
Patient 2270 chewed a chunk of arm and spit it out, then raked his teeth on the exposed bone, and with one motion, snapped the arm off and tore it away from his body. Blood pumped furiously from the now stretched and torn veins and arteries. Apparently, death would be coming much sooner than expeted. He then threw the amputated arm at the observation camera causing the monitor to fade to black. Oh, well.
Dr. X sat back in his chair and poured himself another martini, speared two olives with a toothpick, set them into the glass, then gulped down the delicious gin and vermouth elixer.
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more! You have quite a gift my friend... thanks fo sharing. 
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"You spend whatever time you have left dying, or you spend it living. "
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Wonderful story! I didn't expect that twist on the arm! Thank you....I enjoyed the story very much.
Art!!! For the love of ART!!!!!
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Wicked! I'm not usually one for such dark stuff, but this is amazing. You're definitely gifted! The detail makes the reader feel as if they are sitting outside a window to the room where X and Z are and watching the action occur. I love it!!
Prplflwr20
"I smile becuz I have no idea what's going on...and I'm trying to keep it that way.", she said as she stuck her fingers in her ears and started to sing, "La,la,la,la....La,la,la,la". 
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